Monday, November 24, 2008

I Hate Special Treatment

I really abhor that word. Who doesn't? Who would want to have themselves placed second next to someone else? I also don't want to be treated special as well. Years of being subjected to preferential treatment has led me to really hate that behavior, even if it means that I am the one being given the special treatment.

This is the same reason why I've gradually lost interest in mingling with my former friends in this neighborhood. At first, I enjoyed being with them as I haven't really lived life the way they do at their age. However, when I started looking at things, I noticed a pattern of preferential treatment towards my direction.

For example, if I visit their house, even when I just want to stand because I don't want to sit, they will give up one of their seats just for me. Yup, even if some of them are standing already they will give me that seat. What am I? A lady? During one of the birthday celebrations here, I also had a special serving in a separate plate while all the others were at a boodle fight. One of them also said that I deserve to be treated special.

I hate that treatment. I hate being treated like a king. What the f*** is wrong with these people? Is it because I'm in a class higher than they are? I'd personally hate them if I find out that's their reason; it's as if I didn't go through being in a class like they are. In fact, I already am hating them. I still would have issues if they meant well. The feeling of special treatment makes the gathering boring for me. I don't want to be in a seat higher than anyone else.

I don't understand why, when all others simply fade into the background for mingling with others, I get the exact opposite. It seems I always attract unnecessary attraction or treatment even if I'd try to envelop myself in the midst of everyone. It wasn't a problem when I was younger, but now as I grow older I just want to fade into the background. However, it seems I won't be able to do so in this place.

I hate special treatment and the people who does it. It could be that I'm starting to hate this neighborhood I live in as well.